Consider Mary Parker Follett’s story of two men quarreling in a library. One wants the window open and the other wants it closed. They bicker back and forth about how much to leave it open: a crack, halfway, three-quarters of the way. No solution satisfies them both.
Enter the librarian. She asks one why he wants the window open: “To get some fresh air”. She asks the other why he wants it closed: “To avoid the draft”. After thinking for a minute, she opens a window in the next room, bringing in fresh air without a draft.
Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In, Fisher, Ury and Patton pp. 42
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